It's me in a nutshell

Tom Petty has just signed to play the Superbowl.

Two of my favorite things all in one day.

*sigh*

The stupid rain is fuzzing the signal on my radio. The only station I'm able to pick up is WJIE -- the 24hour Christian station. Super duper...

Only 1day 5hours and 21minutes until I lose my godmother's ebay auction for the 11th time!

I wish my professor would turn in my grade already, it's making me nuts. I'm pretty sure I got an A but it's all hinging on that last (piece of crap) paper that I turned in. Let's hope he's in the holiday spirit when he grades it.

I feel I've been more irritable than usual lately. For whatever reason I have simply lost all degree of patience for certain people (and their magenta hair). It's probably just holiday stress coupled with headaches and PMS and other such nonesense, but regardless, I don't like being on the edge of annoyance all day long. It makes me less patient with clients who call in to argue with me over the legal advice my boss gave them them because "that guy on Law & Order didn't do it that way." *sigh* Everyone's a critic.

These clients of my boss crack me up. They refuse to accept my "I am not a lawyer, I cannot give you legal advice" shpeal. That is both the truth and a cop-out on my part. "Well, just tell me what you would do if you were me then." "Well, I'd probably call a lawyer."

I went to get my hair cut yesterday, fully intending to get it hacked off. But I definitely panicked when I saw the seven inches of hair fall to my feet. I didn't regret it this morning though when it took me only 4 minutes to blow-dry my hair though.

I bought a gallon of milk at the grocery and had a mild panic attack when I saw the expiration date was 12/25, I knew Christmas was close, but holy crap I didn't realize it was within milk-shelf-life close. I gotta get moving on stuff...

Quote of the Week:"She threatened to neuter the dog if I didn't send the alimony payment. I told her she already had my nuts in a jar, why not start a collection?"-my favorite client today

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I've helped mom get through grandma's estate file. All we need to do is to actually close on the house and then we will be finished. My poor mother has been overwhelmed with everyone else and their problems for months, I will be very glad to see all this come to an end for her. Her siblings have been ridiculous, each in their own unique way. Mom really has become the matriarch of that family. I have had a few dreams in which grandma was watching some of the fights that have errupted since her death and just shaking her head at them all. The sooner this matter can be settled, the better.

I finally got school all wrapped up. I didn't do nearly as badly as I thought I would as far as grades go. Jeanine talked me into resuming my Saturday schedule with her and I'll be taking a course online, which means I'll only have to be on campus one day a week. So maybe next term won't be as stressful as this one was. It still doesn't help my never seeing Brad or anyone else problem, but it's the best it can be. I wish I could say that my break were going to be relaxing, but we're so booked up with one holiday gathering after another that I'll be lucky to get a nice nap in before I have to start school again.

In other news:

• I'm enjoying the Patriots' season.


• I want coffee.


• The christmas tree is up, and I'm officially more than half-way finished shopping


• My uncles will be home in a few weeks, then we can all fight in person


• We made serious headway on the condo renovations this weekend


• My head is throbbing and I want a nap

I'm in between clients and am actually caught up on everything that needs to be done through today. Yay team me.

I am at war with my body. I am on two different sets of antibiotics to combat at least two different ailments. Doctor C actually made fun of me at my appointment earlier in the week, "geez, you don't have to fake sick just to come see me" haha. My boss and I both have a bat of the sniffles, and we're both irritated by it. We've been bickering for the past three days, it's kinda sad really. I hate being sick and it seems that I can keep a cold an entire winter if I really put my mind to it. Stupid immune system.

I really want to be finished Christmas shopping. I am not half-way through it this year and that is irritating. I got so busy these past few weeks that I hadn't really had time to think about it. This is where a personal assistant would come in handy...

I haven't been completely idle. I finished up all my schoolwork, with no time to spare and promplty took a nap. I fully intend to catch up with everyone this weekend. And to get the christmas crap out. And to figure out my school schedule for next term once and for all. Jeanine is trying to talk me into staying on the saturday track with her. She's almost got me convinced too. I like the professor that she's trying to get me to stick with, but I don't like his class at all. It's very hard to stay motivated on a Saturday when you have that conflict going on in your head. *Sigh* I just HAD to get another degree. haha

How 'bout them Pats?!!

How God likes to screw with my world:
I stayed up last night until the wee hours and managed to get up to page nine of my ten page paper before calling it a night. I woke up this morning, took my flash key with me to work, knowing that I'd have a dead spot three hours before class in which to bang out that tenth page and turn the stupid thing in once and for all.
I get to the office and make myself a nice hot cup of coffee and pop my flash key in the computer, open my paper: "file corrupted. no such file exists." I cried. I really did. I just cried for a solid three minutes. I have been sick all week long and have not had a good night's sleep in just forever and I had now exactly 2 hours and 11 minutes to recreate my paper and get to class. But, somehow, I managed to pull myself together and get it done, with 2 minutes to spare.

How God REALLY likes ot screw with my world:
My professor took one look around the room of completely exhausted persons and made the announcement that "I've decided to accept your papers up until next Friday, since that is what was on the syllabus originally."
Now, you KNOW that if I had given up trying to redo the paper and had just gone to class with my sob story there would have been no way that man would have granted us this extension.
Just my luck.

I have had three assignments since day one of the semester. Read a book, write a paper. Watch a movie, write a paper. Read a book, form an argument, write a paper. They were on the syllabi on day one. They have not been changed or altered in any way since that time. I have had all semester to do them.... Well...semester is over Saturday. I need to start on a few things....

I tell you what, my mother never ceases to amaze me. I cannot even begin to explain how much she has on her plate at any given time. My grandmother left her in charge of her estate and, well, basically, all of us. Don't get me wrong, grandma couldn't have made a better choice, but who needs that burden? They're We're crazy. All of us. Mom has had to deal with the complicated mess that comes along with summing up an entire lifetime on a few accounting sheets, all while dealing with them. I know grandma picked her though. She is everyone's favorite. Pull any one of her siblings aside and ask which of the others they trusted, they'd all pick her. I understand, she is my best friend too. She's a tough person, I cannot imagine going through some of what she had been through by the time she was my age. Hell, when she was my age, she had me on the way. Nope, I couldn't handle that at all. Not now. On top of everything else mom is dealing with right now, crazy relatives, BS job with BS boss to boot, two crazy daughters, early-menopause, not-smoking (so proud of that by the way), and well--let's face it--daddy, one of her oldest friends let her know that not only does she have cancer and not want to be treated, she wants mom to take care of her in her final days... Yeah. Mom's a bit, well completely overwhelmed, asking me what to do. I really wish I knew what to tell her. Mom is determined to do whatever her friend needs her to do, regardless of what it does to her. She's a mess. I want to help, but I don't know what to do...

Quote of the Week:"Niki, don't you know it's only make-believe?"-My boss' ridiculously smart 4 year old responding to my asking what his stuffed dog's name was

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I always look forward to starting school. Then, I start school, and I remember the BS that comes along with getting a degree. I really like my professors, I really really do. But, some of them I would like more sitting at a pub over a beer than I do being under their academic control.

My Policy professor misread my VERY WELL researched paper and as such, misinterpreted every piece of data I had submitted to support myself. So, he graciously allowed me to "reword" the entire thing so that he didn't find it ambiguous. Which, of course I did because it took that C- he gave me back to the A it should have been. I'm normally not so modest about my course work, but I busted my tail over this paper and it was good. Anyway, problem solved.

Kharma did find a way to kick me in the a** though. I called in "sick" to one of my jobs Thursday so that I could keep an appointment I had made. Friday, my birthday, I do get sick. Nastisly sick. Brad and I went to this crazily fancy restaurant we could never afford except that we had a gift card for it. They put food in front of me and my stomach started screaming. Poor Brad had to take me home and put me to bed.

Saturday morning, the morning of my enormous (1/3 of my grade) presentation, I am still not feeling so hot. I couldn't even manage to get my contacts in my eyes were so swollen and icky. I only went to class because I had every last bit of the material that had to be handed out, and my not showing up would have a direct effect on someone else's grade. So you can imagine how awesome it was that my presenting partner (who holds a bachelors in communication) had an attack of "presenting in front of 20 people jitters" and flew through twenty minutes of material a nervous 10 minute rage...leaving me twenty minutes to fill with my flemy-raspy voice and swaying-barely-able-to-stand up self clining to the podium for dear life. Which of course, does not make for a "lively and engaging" presentation. Oh my I was sick though, couldn't have cared less at the time, I was happy enough that I hadn't fallen over. Of course, now I'm straggling with a big fat C+ which I fully deserved, mind you, but damn what a way to go....

I just need to keep all this in mind when I register for next semester...

Quote of the Week:"What time does she get in?...I want to be the first voice she hears when she gets back." -My most ridiculously demanding client, looking forward to my co-worker's return from her vacation

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I'm sitting in the library between classes. On a saturday. And it's friggin beautiful outside. I am supposed to be doing some research, but, I just don't feel like it right now, and I am going out of my way to avoid doing it. I really do like my classes, but a lot of the readings my professors assign are so dull that they make you want to stab yourself in the eye so you can stop reading them. It took my three hours to read a chapter in my Social Systems Theory text because I kept nodding off in between sentences. Apparently, though, I am not the only one. I have met a lot of people and have made some fast friends in these classes. It's mostly out of deperation for survival probably, but, nonetheless, there it is.

My social life has taken quite a beating. Sunday is my only day off, and I look forward to doing not a damn thing all day--which of course does not happen. I always end up having nine thousand things to finish before the end of the day and end up going to bed late anyway. *sigh* It's like Donna said in class today "one day we'll look back and be amazed at how friggin motivated we once were."

...speaking of which...off I go to dynamics class...

Quote of the Week:"'How do you make water stop running? --- Don't pay the water bill' -Dillon G, Kansas City, KS"-little too specific joke on my laffy taffy...and the reason I'm in social work school.

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I very much love being back in school. I am excited about learning and networking again outside of the office. It's a lot of work, but, it will be okay. It's mostly a lot of reading and the accountablity of "class discussions," throw in a few (too many) group projects and papers and *poof* (three years later) you've got a master's degree...

Quote of the Week: "..wait..YOU'RE getting married??!" -Eric, my ex, who I ran into while out for my bachelorette party

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Yep. Holy crap. I'm getting married!

Quote of the Week:"Tuna helper."-NOverton.

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I know I've been completely MIA, thanks for noticing. I have been a basketcase for the past, well, several several weeks. Doc finally after five years, gave me the approval to cut off the 'ol jewels. I don't have to wear that stupid medical id around my wrist announcing to the world that I might have a medical fit in front of you, beware. I had three EEGs in a row with no significant activity (hold your jokes) and got the nod, I cut it off IN his office. I have to carry a card in my wallet still, but, no biggie. Of course, ever since that appointment, my immune system has been on hiatus and I've had a cold/whatever it is off and on every other day...

I've not written in here so long I've almost got too much to say for this place. I'll make a concerted effort to post more over the next few days, you'll have to forgive my massive ADD.

Grandma's death is still wearing on me and everyone else. It's really bizarre, and it hits me really randomly. Like, aunt Phyllis asking me to transfer her contact list from her old phone to her new phone. I come across my grandmother's name and stop---do I put her in there? how can I not? That decision is even more real when stuffing envelopes for a wedding that she wanted to see more than anything. I found the ugly ring she gave me and haven't taken it off since the funeral, it makes me smile when I look at it and think of her appologizing that it was so 'damn ugly' a ring. It's the best thing she's ever given me. (more on this later)

Grandma's death has also brought about lots of passive-agressive, manipulative, hateful, manic-depressive, spiteful fights as well. That surely helps.

My moms made me sit through a shower this weekend, totally my thing, right? So much estrogen in one room you can feel it choking you. So...wedding planning is not for me. Scratch that off the list of possible life plans. Not only do I not care about half of these decisions, I don't know the difference between half of the options I'm presented with, and have no idea how to respond. I swear to god I don't even know what kind of expression to put across my face sometimes. Besides which, we've got the 'too many cooks in one kitchen' problem going on. People are coming out of the woodwork to help with these things, which is great, don't get me wrong, but also overwhelming. You don't want to hurt feelings and you don't want to be miserable either. But you inevitably will do one or both and have to start over anyway. I have never fought so much in my life. (I told Bradley that no matter what happens in my life, even if he drops dead at the alter, I am never ever ever going through this again. My next husband and I will go before the judge and be done with it.) Anyway, as soon as all this wedding crap is over I can go to the beach and lay in the sun with Harry Potter, a cold drink, and Bradley, 400 miles away from our entire guest list. All 400 of them. <--shoot me

I had a great shower thrown by my lovely best woman. I love her for her efforts.

My boss and I are moving our office building. Friday. I will no longer have to deal with the downtown commute. I will have to get up early so I can leave Fern Creek and make it to Buechel by 8:00. Nice 3 mile commute to job #1 followed by a 6 mile commute to job #2. I haven't quite decided what I am going to do about the whole two jobs thing after school starts. Reading over the curriculum for my classes, I may not do a thing about it. My clasess are all night/weekend and, if the syllabi don't shock me, I may try it for a while. I already know which job will be dropped if I feel my GPA is in danger. I want this degree too much, and having Brad's paycheck helping to cover the rent, it's not going to devestate me to quit. So, we'll see where that goes.

Sidebar: I am so irritated by charities not accepting my volunteer time per my schedule. I signed up a few months ago to work the senior games in Louisville, looked like fun, and good on my resume as well. They gave me a schedule working me Monday and Thursday 2:00 - 5:30. I cannot take off work to go volunteer myself elsewhere. Makes me crazy.

Quote of the Week:"Is that an illicit weapon in your pocket, or are you just happy to see me?"-Clarence, the security guard, fucking with me because he made XRay guy at the courthouse

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I know, I know, I haven't updated this thing in weeks. Well, quick run down then I'll post something better later. I promise:

• I got into the graduate program for the Social Work school. I have prospects for my future again! I really am excited about it the more I think it over. I'm thrilled to be back on campus, I was starting to get the shakes.
• The wedding is almost here. We still have a ton to do...it occurs to me that we know entierly too many people. Cannot wait to be married on the beach with this wedding crap behind us.
• My family is on my nerves. Some members of my family (one in particular) would benefit from a good smack upside the head to knock some sense into them.
• My mom is amazing.
• Work is going pretty well. Both bosses are on vacation this week. That helps
• I am still having a hard time with grandma's death. She was a big part of my structure and, especially planning this wedding, I miss her very much
• My grandmother left me her car. I have a nicer vehicle than I could ever expect to have at this point in my life
• Reginald the Civic was sold to a good home
• Dad got to vote for the first time
• I hope my sister calls me back

Quote of the (Couple of Weeks Ago):" I never want to get married........because I never want to get divorced... and end up here."-Ali, looking around the crowd at Jim Porters

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I have to ask, which do you think best describes Brad's and my relationship, the one I am putting into the newspaper, or the one that I want to put into the newspaper?....
( Read more... )

Quote of the Week:"'I am sick to death of all this Thunder-crap out here.' 'Awww, where's your Derby spirit?'"-James and Mitch, before James flipped Mitch off

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My cat used to be a really good alarm clock. Ten minutes before my alarm would go off each morning, he would come lay on my chest and snuggle with me. As soon as I turned off the alarm, he would start hitting me in the face until I got up. I guess that it's a sign that I'm not home enough or something, because now he comes and sits on my chest and when the alarm goes off, he starts purring and doing his 'don't leave, pet me' head-butt. What a cutie. I blame him for my being late this morning.

I want it to be warm. More specifically, I want to be where it is warm. With an ocean next to it.

It occured to me leaving the check out line today why the bagger had giving me a strange look, kinda like he felt sorry for me. I started looking at my receipt on the way to the car, just the casual "make sure I got everything I paid for" review. It wasn't a very long receipt, since I had gone to the fruit market earlier in the week for mom so I'd gotten all my veggies and produces, and I had gotten milk and a few things the other day while I was out for my aunt, so I really didn't need a but a few things. I'll just give you my purchase reciept list:

• Michelina's Frozen dinners (7)<---on sale 7 for $5.99
• Cat food (3 bags)<---on sale 3 for price of 2
• 6 Pack Miller Lite<---no sale, I'm just out.
• 1 Soap Opera Digest<---for my auntie

...Priceless...